Cold Turkey? Moderation? Bit by bit until I just give up??

I read a lot of blogs about living a Simple Life. (Shocking, I know. LOL) I am not naive enough to think that these women have lives that are quite as simple and idyllic as they appear on the page with all of their perfect pictures of their perfectly simple clothes, their perfectly simple food, their perfectly simple toys, their perfectly simple family. And I know that I'm looking at their life now - not 5, 10 years ago when they were spending money wildly or when they ate food that wasn't 100% organic.

And the truth of the matter is that I will never be THAT Simple anyway. We will probably always have plastic in our house. I will probably continue to let my children to watch TV occasionally. I will never be at the place that I make all of our clothes, grow all of our food. I will always love Diet Pepsi (I didn't say that I will always drink it because I am getting closer to giving it up . . . )

And another truth of the matter is that it isn't like I'm doing Nothing Simply. I do garden and can. I do live frugally. I do buy most things used. I am eating much more healthily lately. (I know, Diet Pepsi isn't healthy. ) I am doing pretty well on food storage. We don't use credit. We do have a house, enough clothes, enough food. I do know how to sew and crochet. We use a budget.

But then things happen - like having to pay for new window wells when you just spent most of your savings on carpet and a washer and dryer. Like having not enough money for years, and as a result of that, making some poor financial decisions that will take YEARS and YEARS to fix. Things like feeling like you only get to be happy for a brief moment before it all goes back to being hard again.

The children wanted to go out to dinner tonight. Seriously, we shouldn't go out to eat for about 10 more years if we wanted to really be financially responsible. But yet, I knew it was a minor request. And I knew that $20 probably wouldn't make a huge difference either way - long term or even short term. But I knew that I "should" make something homemade. It would be healthier. It would be much cheaper. It would be using our resources wisely. And it wouldn't be just another "oh, this will be o.k." because we have obviously used that line over and over again. And while this $20 wouldn't hurt, $20 every month for the last 10 years hurts.

But is that how life is supposed to be? Should I never take the kids out? Should I never get my hair done at a salon? I know that I say that I want that Simple Life where I wouldn't do those things. But I think maybe it is a lie. Or maybe I want it all. I want to be able to Choose to live Simply. And have it be My version of the Simple Life.

I'd also like to figure out once and for all how to achieve that Simple Life. Do I really want it? I think that is the real question? I'm thinking that maybe I don't want it after all. Well, not the Perfectly Simple anyway. Perfectly Simple is too much for me. I tend to look at things in a very black and white sort of way, and then get so frustrated and discouraged when all I get is grey. To me, so often, I think that the only way to achieve something is to do it ALL THE WAY. And then inevitably, I fail a little. And then I give up ALL THE WAY.

I remember visiting a website years ago (this was way before blogs) and there was this women who shared about how they lived such a natural life, and so in tune with each other, and the seasons, and on and on. Even back then, that sort of life was appealing to me, even though it was so far from my life then. And then one day, her website disappeared. I checked for months afterwards, hoping that it would reappear on another server or something. And then a year or so later, I heard that the woman had left her husband, had given up her natural life completely, and that she had basically become the complete antithesis of her former life. Now, I don't know for sure if this is even true, and I don't know what ever happened, and I certainly don't know the circumstances behind it, if any of it is true. And I'm not sharing this story because I'm judging her. I'm sharing this story because it seemed like she was a woman who saw in black and white too. And sometimes, when you have picked Black, and you are confronted with Grey, it is so hard to know what to do except pick White.

I know that Moderation is the best - in all things, Simple Life included. But it is SO hard for me to do it. It just isn't the way I'm wired. When I try, most of the time, I end up just floundering and feeling like I'm doing nothing well.

Bit by Bit Until I give up? This is what I usually do and try and think of it as Moderation. I do just enough so that I feel successful, but it isn't enough for me to really bring it in as a habit, a lifestyle. And since it is just a little bit, it just slips away, as if it was never there.

I know I'm just rambling. And I'm mixing so many things together. Money. Provident Living. Simple Living. Being a Mother. Being a Perfectionist. Being a Failure. Feeling like I didn't imagine how this is how my life was going to be at 43.

But for me, this is My Life. It is so hard for me to separate all these things because to me, they aren't separate. It's like that line in some movie "People say 'It wasn't personal.' but what they really mean is that it isn't personal to them. But it is really personal to me." (I'm completely botching that quote too. Anybody recognize it though? I can't remember. Great, now I'm losing my mind too LOL)

I don't know. What I do know is that I'm just trying to find My way. Not very confidently. Not even very well. And I don't know what I'm going to decide, about anything really, or when. But right now, I do know that I'm going to get up tomorrow. And maybe try just a little harder to figure out how to live with Off Black (seriously, why is Off Black not a color, but Off White is?)

Food Storage Series: Flour

Flour is the ingredient that gives baked goods their shape and texture. When flour is mixed with water, proteins in the flour interact to form gluten. Gluten gives dough elasticity and ability to stretch as a leavening agent produces carbon dioxide gas that causes dough to rise.

Different types of wheat flour contain varying amounts of proteins for forming gluten. Hard whole wheat flour is a blend of soft and hard wheat flours with a 9% - 10% protein level.

Whole wheat flour is ground from the entire kernel containing the bran, germ and endosperm. Bran in whole wheat flour reduces gluten development. Baked products made from whole wheat flour tend to be heavier and denser than those made from white flour. Whole grain flours are not refined and retain all their nutrients. Flours labeled as "wheat" instead of "whole wheat" are often refined.

White flour is refined whole flour, ground only from the endosperm. Because it contains neither the bran or the germ, it has less fiber per cup (3.4 grams) than whole wheat flour (15 grams.)

The refining process strips away the fiber-rich bran and the germ which contains valuable vitamins and minerals. To replace these nutrients, flour is enriched by the addition of vitamins and minerals.

All-purpose flour is the flour most commonly used in the home. It comes as bleached and unbleached and must be labeled. Nutritionally, bleached and unbleached are the same. Both can be readily substituted.

Bleached: refers to flour that has been treated with chlorine to whiten and improve its baking qualities. The chlorine evaporates, does not destroy the nutrients, but does reduce the risk of spoilage or contamination. It is a process which speeds up the natural lightening and maturing of the flour.

Unbleached: is aged and bleached naturally by oxygen in the air. It is more golden in color and may not have the consistency in baking qualities that bleached flour does.

Enriched: Is flour that has been supplemented with iron and four B-vitamins (thiamine, niacin, riboflavin, and folic acid) in amounts equal to what was removed. Compared to the whole grain, it is still deficient in fiber, protein value and 18 race vitamins and minerals.

A small amount of malted barley flour is usually added to all-purpose flour to increase its level of enzyme activity.

(Whole wheat recipes will be added to Simply Recipes in the next few days. Sorry about the delay in the Food Storage post. It has been a crazy week around here.)

The Good and Bad of Home Ownership . . .

We have lived in our current home for almost 8 years. The carpet upstairs, after years of use by our children, daycare/preschool kids, and a dog had, shall we say, seen MUCH better days. We saved up and budgeted for new flooring this year. It took us awhile to decide what to get, and even longer to finally get it scheduled, but we finally got it done last week. I LOVE it.

Here is the carpet in the bedroom.

In the carpet.

And in the living room/playroom.

So that's the good.



And the bad . . .

Yesterday, we had a HUGE rainstorm. I've never seen rain come down so hard in such a short time. I heard a noise from the girls room and I thought they had left their window open. I opened the door and went over to the window, and just as I did, mud poured up and over the window sill and through the closed window.

If there is anything good in this situation, it is that there was a bed underneath the window with bedding on it, and most of the water and mud was absorbed in the bedding and the towels, etc. that we were using against the window. So we have very little damage inside the house.

But there is lots of bad. The window well bulged and the bolts came out of the foundation and the seal broke on the window wells. And it happened on the other window well on that side of the house too (although no mud got through that window.) And unfortunately, it isn't just a matter of putting in new window wells. We will need to excavate the dirt on that side of the house and figure out WHY there was water running down the sides of the window wells, what caused the window wells to bulge and break under the pressure, and we will need to fix that problem (which could be a foundation problem), and then replace the window wells, fill in the area, seed or sod.

None of this is covered by our homeowners insurance because it is considered a settlement/foundation/maintenance issue.

The construction company that built our house (8 years ago) went bankrupt 5 years ago.

The money that we had saved for home issues was spent last weekend on new carpet.

Anyway, here are some pictures of the window well problems -


The is the window that had mud pouring into the house.

We had people dig outside on the side of the window wells where the seal broke.

Here it is from the inside. The other window is actually much worse. The area that is separated and bulging is about two feet long. (It is also the window that had mud coming inside.)

And off we go . . . .

We decided to take a slight spur of the moment trip over Spring Break and we went to the St. Louis Zoo. We live about 3 hours away, so it isn't too bad of a drive. And I love how so many of the things are free in St. Louis. We went to the St. Louis Zoo about 18 months ago. We have meant to get back sooner, but this was the first chance that we have had to go back since then. We went to the Zoo and the St. Louis Art Museum.

Jelly Bean touching a big bug - she was the only brave one.

In the butterfly/moth area - we just finished talking about pollination in school and how butterflies and moths help with pollination and the kids were so excited to show the zoo helper how smart they were LOL

The Simple Kids - it was a beautiful day. Sunny and mid 60s.

Getting a bit wet by the waterfall.

Hanging out by the Reptile House

The bear was still having a hard time waking up.

I feel your pain, dude.

I didn't take any pictures at the Art Museum, but it was very cool, and great for my crowd. It was right next to the Zoo, and we could get through it in an hour, so we could still have time to do other things (and although my children really enjoyed it, I don't know if they would enjoy it enough to drive all the way there to JUST go to the museum.) We have been studying Ancient Civilizations in History and various artists in Art, so the children got a chance to see some of the actual pieces of art that we had discussed, and they really enjoyed that. The kids also enjoyed running and rolling down the hill in front of the Museum too. LOL

A great trip was had by all!

Well, I just wouldn't be me if I didn't talk about thrifting for Easter outfits . . .

Flower is wearing a dress and short sleeve cardigan from Goodwill (and they didn't come together, so an even more remarkable find). Her sandals are also from Goodwill. Total Cost for her outfit: $4.50.

Jelly Bean is wearing a dress from Goodwill. Her sandals are also from Goodwill. Her sweater is new (but was 50% off) from Children's Place. Total Cost for her outfit: $9.75.

Super is wearing shirt that was given to him by his cousins, a sweater vest that was given to him by a neighbor boy's mom, and pants from a former preschool student. The shoes were new (but purchased back in November) from Payless. I bought them for $10 back then (and also got a brown pair for free during a buy one, get one free sale.) So I didn't really have to buy him anything specifically for his Easter outfit. Total Cost for his outfit: $0.

TOTAL for all three outfits: $14.25.

Happy Easter!

We have have an semi-annual tradition of taking pictures on this retaining wall - at Easter and during the first snowstorm. If I hunted around on this blog, I could link you to some of the pics. I'm not feeling that ambitious right now, but maybe I'll put some links up later. Maybe.

The Simple Kids - Easter 2010

The girls dancing. The grass is so long, it already needs to be cut!

In the front yard

We also tend to take pictures by the tree in the front yard - usually at Easter and in the Fall. Sometimes another one in the Spring when all the blossoms are out.

On the front steps.

May you have a lovely day with those you love on this Easter Day.

Food Storage Series: Wheat

About Wheat

1 cup dry wheat = about 2 cups cooked
1 cup whole wheat = about 1 3/4 cups flour
1 cup cracked wheat = 2 2/3 cups cooked

It is believed that wheat was first domesticated from wild grasses as long ago as 9,000 B.C It has been found in the pyramids of Egypt. Wheat is mentioned throughout the Bible and has been a food of man throughout history. It is considered the most important grain crop in the world, providing 40 - 60% of the available energy and protein in developing countries.

Rinse whole wheat kernels before sprouting or cooking, but do not wash before grinding or milling.

When starting to use whole wheat flour in place of white in your baking, make the transition gradually by first replacing just half of the white flour with the same amount of whole wheat flour.

How to Crack Wheat

There are numerous flour mills and grinders, and come in either electric or hand-turned. Determine what the needs of your family are, and then purchase what will fill that need.

Small amounts of wheat, about 3/4 cup at a time, can be cracked in a blender. Blenders are not made for grinding large amounts of wheat and will not be able to grind enough flour for bread.

An emergency hand grinder can be made using a tall empty juice or #10 can with one end removed and three 30" lengths of ordinary steel water pipe. Cut pipe ends even, file metal slivers off and duct tape pipes together. Put clean, dry grain 1" deep in can. To prevent blisters, wear gloves. Place can on a smooth, hard, solid surface such as concrete. To pound the grain, sit with the can held between your feet. Move the pipes straight up and down about 3", with a rapid stroke.

If no grinder is available, soaked and/or spouted wheat kernels can be pounded with a mallet.

Methods For Cooking Wheat

Rinse and cook whole wheat using one of the methods below. Soaking wheat cuts cooking time in half but isn't required. This ready to use wheat may be safely stored in the refrigerator up to 2 weeks.

Stove Top: Place 3 cups water, 1 cup whole wheat and 1/2 - 3/4 teaspoon salt in a saucepan. Cover and soak overnight. Do not drain. In the morning, stir wheat and heat to boiling in the same water. Simmer for about 30 minutes. Stir occasionally. Remove from heat. Leave covered for 5 minutes.

Crock Pot: Mix 1 cup of wheat, 4 cups of water, 1/2 - 3/4 teaspoon salt in crock pot. Cook overnight on low setting.

Oven: Combine 1 cup wheat, 3 cups water, 1/2 - 3/4 teaspoon salt in saucepan. Bring to a boil. Simmer, covered for 5 minutes. Place pan in a 300 degree F pre-heated oven. Shut door and turn heat off. Let sit overnight.

Pressure Cooker: Put 1 cup wheat, 2 cups water and 1/2 teaspoon salt in a pressure cooker. Add 1 tablespoon oil. Pressure 15 minutes at 15 lbs. pressure. Do not "quick release" lid. Turn off heat and let pressure go down naturally.

Thermos Wheat: Place 1 cup wheat in a thermos. Add 1/2 salt and 2 cups boiling water. Let stand 3-4 hours.

Wheat Grass

Cereal grasses have been used as human food supplements since the 1930s. All have very similar nutritional value, but wheat is favored for its availability and ease of growing.

Plant wheat in a wooden, clay or plastic planting try or pot. Whatever planter is used, it MUST have drainage holes in the bottom. Any soil will do, and the amount is up to you. The more soil used, the more water it can hold, the longer time between waterings, but heavier if it needs to be moved.

Soak wheat 24 hours in room-temperature water. Spread on thouroughly moistened soil and sprinkle lightly with dry soil. Dampen with water several times a day. Place in a low-light, room-temperature location. After shoots appear in 2-4 days, keep soil damp by watering at the roots. When still quite small, it is best to keep shoots away from direct light. Wait until shoots are 1-1 1/2 " tall to expose to light. To "green up" the grass, water well just before harvest and expose to light. The darker the color, the stronger the taste, but with increased nutrients.

Harvest by cutting 1/4 ' 1/2" above the soil when grass is about 6" tall. Grass can produce a 2nd and 3rd crop if watering is continued after the first crop is cut.

Grass stores about 6 days when refrigerated in a plastic bag. Grasses are usually juiced, but you can also put them in stir-fry, salad, bread, white sauce or soup.

Cracked Wheat recipes are contained in the Wheat Recipes at Simply Recipes. I'll put up some recipes about Wheat Grass in the next couple of days.